“He sees the knives on the counter, he thinks maybe he can go out that way, he just wants his mind to stop the wander, to stop the shower, of all these emotions that hold all the power, stacked as high as a tower & that tower keeps holding the power to blocking the sunlight, he’s lost in this dark city of towers & now he’s lost in this dark fight, so now he realizes he really has lost all the power,” Tyler writes. Then he recalls his suicide attempt.
“He climbs up a tree in the backyard & starts to ponder. As tears fall from his cheeks, he can see the rope that’s tied to a tire, where he used to swing as a kid just to see if he could get higher. He’s always been a fighter, but he thinks today is his time to surrender. He grabs that rope, ties it around his neck, then jumps with the weight of all his emotions & he can’t seem to cope with all that, which makes the rope snap back.”
“He sees that rope swinging there eerily under the blue sky where these free birds fly,” Tyler recalls. “He’s envious that these birds can just fly & he’s jealous that these birds don’t have to sit here in the dirt while still gasping for air as his neck stars to bleed & really starts to hurt.”
Tyler has shared that his recent efforts in therapy and support from his wife Catelynn, who has also suffered from suicidal thoughts has helped him feel more stable. He uses poetry as an outlet to alleviate some of his negative thoughts.
Everyone is bound to encounter more loss in their life, so it’s good that Catelynn has learned new coping skills. Unfortunately, Catelynn and Tyler have been hit with another death in their family.
Like many of the Teen Mom cast members, Catelynn and Tyler’s family has been getting bigger over the years. After their upsetting miscarriage, Catelynn and Tyler welcomed another daughter, Vaeda, into their family. Fans are constantly curious whether they’ll be trying for another child, since it’s no secret that Tyler wants to have a son!
But it’s not just children that make Tyler and Catelynn’s family special. They also made their family bigger with a beautiful dog named Caesar! Caesar has been part of their family for years, so it’s no wonder why this update is so devastating.
“Our Caesar… please pull through… your family loves you,” Catelynn shared on social media, adding a crying emoji. She posted two adorable shots of her cuddly dog Caesar, one of which featured her oldest daughter Nova. Fans were quick to share their sympathy for the Baltierra family.
“For everything it’s worth, they have had that dog since s1. Least they keep [it] alive, just not ponies,” wrote Twiggythetiny on reddit. User Princcesss88 wrote, “I hope he’ll be okay. Losing a pet is so hard. 🥺” User Deleteordecay wrote, “It’s so tough when the family pet is sick and you don’t know if they’ll make it or not. Hang in there big dog!”
Unfortunately, Catelynn later updated with bad news: Caeser has passed.
“Caesar, you were the best dog I could have ever asked for. I was 18 when I got you & you’ll never know how much you helped me when I was going through hard times & when our little family started expanding, you loved my babies like they were your own! I’ll miss you Buddy,” she shared.
Although this news is heartbreaking, Catelynn did share the silver lining: it looks like she and Tyler will be adopting another family dog.
“Novalee said she’s gonna ask Santa for a puppy…” Catelynn tweeted, tagging Tyler. “What are we gonna do?”
She later tweeted, “We are looking for a Doberman rescue that we could eventually adopt a little older Doberman… any of you know people or places? Even some in the state of Michigan?”
This isn’t the only thing that’s weighing heavily on Catelynn’s mind. Her sister-in-law Amber was recently arrested for assault!